Self-flagellation is a whole new art

"Hell's Kitchen," a new reality show on the Fox network is like a train wreck: you can't help but watch.

I got sucked into this show last Monday, when nothing else was on tv. I hate reality shows in general, but for some reason, I couldn't tear myself away.

Gordon Ramsay is an apparently famous chef in Britain, and now he has come to the U.S. to start a new restaurant called Hell's Kitchen. The contestants' dream is to own their own restaurant, and that is the prize of this contest.

Woe betide the customers. In the two shows, it has taken over two hours for some of them to get their main courses. On last night's show, one table ordered a pizza, and then some idiot proclaiming his doctorate in music beleaguered the poor maitre d', as if he had anything to do with the poor service. (The "doctor" was the one who looked stupid. Heh.)

I can hardly believe it is a contest. It is more for Ramsay to show off his extreme perfectionism, and colorful vocabulary, which Fox has to bleep out.

New episodes are on Monday nights at 8pm (CDT).